2015....and the move

Well 2015 started off with a bang. I got laid off...AGAIN. Just 6 days into the new year. Crazy I know but in a lot of ways, I'm relieved. I didn't feel like this job was working out and I wasn't very happy there.

So now what? Things have been lining in the past few months that have lead me to the conclusion that I need to move back east with my family. Honestly, I've been thinking about it heavily for the last 3 years. I've just had to overcome some mental and "physical" obstacles to really "get there".
Where I live now is the longest I've lived any where in my life. To the point where this city became home to me. That was why when my Mom retired, I stayed here.
You get to a point in your life though where the priorities you had in your younger years aren't as important or don't exist.

Maybe some will say I'm running away; but I'm not. I don't have a lot of bad memories to run from. I have great memories here. I just don't feel like I have much of a life here anymore. I spend  more and more time by myself. Most of my friends have married and have moved on with their own lives. There isn't anything here that I can't get back home. Plus I'll be able to spend more time with my family. I have family back east who I rarely see as my time back home is so limited. I have cousins, I am Italian after all, who I rarely spend time with. I could be doing things with them, or my sister or my Mom, or my nieces and nephews instead of spending time by myself.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not unhappy. I just think I could be a lot happier.

There are some negatives to leaving here; I am leaving an AMAZING apartment. I will never find anything this nice and affordable! I will miss all the places I've become so accustomed and comfortable with. I will DEFINITELY miss Wegmans!

But weigh that with what I'll be gaining! My family, the doggies, the beautiful city of Saratoga Springs, living near where I grew up, near the Adirondacks, the lakes, the mountains.....who wouldn't go?

The more things change, the more they stay the same...

I have SERIOUSLY neglected this blog. Wow - over a year since a post?! I suck!!
So I'm back because,..well, I have a lot to complain about. This blog has always been great therapy for me. Once you get your feelings "out there" into the blogisphere - you feel the weight of those issues lifted off of you. It's literarily cathartic. (And you'll have to excuse my grammar - I like to make up words)

What's changed in the last year. My job. I should've gone w/my gut last November and turned it down. Although it beats being unemployed....
I have learned one thing; I never want a job with the details of "customer service" as part of it, or doing any kind of dispatching. It's just not for me!

Then there was the fall out. A woman I've been friends with since the 80s, kicked our friendship to the curb. I can't say I was surprised. Actually, I'm shocked it took her this long. Things have been going downhill since she got married. And it has nothing to do with her marriage either; her husband is an awesome guy. I just could never do enough for her. I was always the bad friend, my loyalty was always questioned. She's a very nurturing person, almost to a fault and she expected me, even after knowing me all this time, to be exactly like her. But I'm not. I can only be myself. I did care, but never enough in her opinion. She never let go of past issues we had. Forgetting is one thing; she never forgave. So how can you be friends with someone who holds stuff over your head? And then there was my friendship with a woman who she had a falling out with a few years back. She brought that up as well. It used to be the 3 of us; the 3 Musketeers; hanging out whenever we could. But people get older and relationships change. People change. Something blew up between them, it wasn't pretty but I thought we had moved on from it. My friendship with this woman had nothing to do with her, but she never saw it that way. She saw it as a betrayal. Their issues had nothing to do with me, so why should I choose sides? That is not my way, never was.
I thought a lot about things after the "dump me" phone call. I thought about my sister and her friends, and my mother and the friends she had at my age. I can't imagine any of them treating my Mom or my sister like this woman has treated me. So although it hurts and I miss it, I will let it go. It was her choice, not mine and she will have to live with it just as much I do.

Okay - on to some positives! I'm in another show! And I have a minor lead again! I was cast as Ma Bailey in a local production of It's a Wonderful Life the Musical. We've been in rehearsals for three weeks now and it's going pretty good. Still a lot of work to do - but I love it.

Also - I had an idea for either a book or a screen play the other night. It's something that's been in my "daydream" mind on and off for years and the other day I was thinking "ya know, I should write it." It might take me a REALLY long time to finish, but I figured it would be a great winter project once the show is over.

So that's things in a nutshell for now. Hopefully the nut won't crack! ;)

Join the family business....

Summer has ended, thank goodness! Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the great weather but when you're a girl (woman) with some extra "LB's" on her, wearing shorts and short sleeved shirts isn't much fun. I prefer quarter length or long sleeves and jeans, thanks! Ah...fall is here! Football is here! But that's not the reason I'm posting.
Once again, I've been cast in a local community theater group's musical. A different group from the previous groups I've performed with. The original auditions reminded me a lot of when I auditioned for The Sound of Music; VERY low key, VERY low pressure. We were called up to the stage and taught the song that was posted in the audition packet, went over it a few times and then were called up numerically one-by-one to sing it. I felt REALLY good about my singing. Probably better than I have at ANY of the auditions I've been to since Annie. My voice teacher would've been proud!
Then we were taught a dance routine which was about 14 counts of four. We went over it a few times and then were called up in groups of four to perform it twice. I was in the first group and I felt pretty good about how I performed that too. I left that night feeling VERY positive that I had performed well enough for a spot in the cast, maybe even a lead.
Lo and behold, about an hour later, I got a call from the director asking me to come back the next night for a call back audition for a lead part I had circled on my audition application. She said there would be more singing and some acting. I was REALLY excited! And nervous. More so than for then before. I have never been called back before! I had no idea what to expect. And I had less than 24 hours to prepare...on a week day.
So during work I downloaded the song that the character sang. I also scoured the internet and YouTube looking for videos of the character, anything I could find that would help. I listened to the song OVER and OVER! That was the best I could do.
I got to the school that night and I knew my competition right away; an older woman (or maybe she's younger, I'm not sure) who was shorter, thinner and had more of the face (and nose actually) for the part. I couldn't stop looking over at her. Unfortunately, we had to wait over an hour until they called us up to the piano to go over the part of the solo we had to sing. It wasn't the part I was most confident with, doesn't it figure. The other woman went up first, and she sang it off book, totally characterized it and was hilarious. I knew it, I was screwed. I got up, did the best I could to sing the right notes and throw in a little characterization and that was it. I didn't fare much better in the acting. The 2nd scene we did someone didn't finish their line and everyone was waiting for me while I was waiting for the right line to finish - so I made it look bad. The other woman nailed it. I knew I was sunk, I was bummed. Amazing how you can be flying high one night and then be brought right back to earth the next. The other woman thanked me before I left, I'm not sure what for. For making her look good? Oh sure - any time. LOL! I mean, it was nice of her but I was confused as to how to interpret it.
The next day around lunch time I got an email from the director; I was offered a bit part and part of the ensemble. It was true - my little thoughts of hope were bashed. I was REALLY disappointing. I guess in a lot of ways I'm still that kid who always wants their way. So I spent the next few hours debating on whether to accept the lesser roles. Then I thought to myself "If I hadn't been called back like the last two shows I was in, would I have been as hesitant to accept what they offered me? I knew the answer; not a chance! So I emailed my acceptance.
Let's see how long it takes me to get over it - especially when that "other woman" starts rehearsing that freakin solo! LOL!

The birds of Spring

It's no secret that although I'm not a big fan of summer (mostly because of high heat and humidity), I am a big fan of spring. I love the rebirth of nature, especially my birdy friends.
I hang feeders from my sunporch in the warmer days. I would hang them in winter but the windows freeze up and they're impossible to open. So the first chance I get, I put out the feeders and hope that whatever breed I can get finds them.
The city seems to be the home of WAY too many sparrows. That's the majority of what I get and considering the seed I buy runs me about $40+ dollars a month, it's a bit annoying knowing that I'm feeding a bunch of birds who would be just as happy eating out of a garbage can. BUT, there are also other breeds I love that come to visit. The other day when I put my window feeder out, it wasn't hanging 5 minutes before a gorgeous, red male House Finch paid it a visit. Today he even brought his mate. I also have a stunning male yellow finch visiting my inventive nyjer feeder I bought last year. Why inventive? The feed ports are below the perches so the bird hangs upside down to feed from it. And not many can do it. Keeps the sparrows out of it. Now if I could find a way to keep the big, fat, anything-eating doves out of my window feeder. And keep the pigeons away (The winged rats that they are!)
Bird feeding in the city is an ongoing struggle to attract and keep the pretty birds around while keeping the bullies and buzzards away.

Gunna take longer than 9 to 5

My first rehearsal with the new show (and new company) is in the books and BOY was it different than my last first rehearsal experience. The actual first rehearsal was the night I was on an Amtrak train, west-bound for home so I missed all of what I heard was general choas and lack of organization.
SK picked me up and as we drove she told me how the first night was basically a big miss in her book. (As in "You're lucky you missed it".) When the dust of getting everyone in and scripted and paperwork, the vocal session wasn't much better.
The first difference between this group and my previous experience was they don't use an accompanist during rehearsals. They have this software called Rehearscore. It can play any part, break it down for you and everything. Modern technology, so wonderful! But in this case I'd have to say it's some what of a collasal fail. There's no one to play you a chord so you know your starting note. Just silence and then, SING! Took some getting used to and I still don't think I like it. We did get a copy of it to download so we can use it at home, which is probably what it's best for but using it as a rehearsal with the cast, I can't say I'm a big fan.
The cast is a mixed bag of nuts; most of them look like they know each other pretty well, especially the women. The best surprise was the alto section was bigger than the section of sopranos. They were just comprised of my buddy SK and two other women. The altos were at least 8 women strong. I was waiting for the musical director to start moving people over but it didn't happen.
After suffering through the opening number, we started working on the second number. Thankfully it was much easier, AND more fun. Took us a few minutes until everyone was yelling to play it up to tempo.
While the MD (musical director) was working with the basses and tenors, I perused the script to find my lines and was pleasantly surprised to find I have quite a few. I also chatted with "Roz" quite a bit since she was sitting next to me and I don't think she kept quiet the whole rehearsal. She's definitely one of those "theatre people" and isn't afraid to voice any thought that comes into her head, even at the mercy of insulting anyone or ticking off the MD. I thought I was missing that filter between your brain and your mouth but she makes me look introverted.
I did have one really good line though. At the beginning of the rehearsal they had us all stand up one at a time, introduce ourselves and say what character we'd be playing. When they got to me I said my name and then said "This looks like an AA meeting, which is appropriate considering I'm playing the part of Margaret". Cue laughter!

No bad knee is gunna keep me down!

So now that winter doesn't have a strangle hold of this area, I decided to look for another audition for a spring show. I had heard a few months ago that one of the local theatre companies had announced they were going to do 9 to 5 the musical. I knew nothing about the show but am exTREMELY familiar with the movie. So my plan was to audition in March. Then February reared it's ugly head and among many issues that month, I had slight tears to my meniscus in my left knee along with a strained ACL. The first thing I thought of was "there goes my chance at 9 to 5". I was REALLY upset.

But as luck would have it, my knee seemed to recover pretty quickly. So when audition week came around, although I was fighting a nasty head cold which changed my plans to audition the 1st night, I sucked it up and went to the 2nd night auditions.
The auditions were held in a church. So I stood in line to turn in my audition form which I had completed ahead of time, got my number (I think I was #28) and sat on a bench trying not to get into my head too much. There were about 38/40 people there. One by one they called us upstairs for vocal range assessment. That was done in the chapel. The vocal director was at the piano and just had me sing some scales; took about two minutes and then it was back down to the "hot box" (yeah, it was sweaty-hot downstairs) to wait until everyone was done. Then they called us back up to the chapel to learn the song and then the dance. Yes, I danced on my bad knee. I had to. I WANTED to. I had my brace on, I took it somewhat easy but I also went for it. Surprisingly, unlike my last couple auditions, I felt like I picked up on the choreography really quickly. Then it was back down to the sweaty wait chamber to wait until I was called. During that time I just ran through the choreo a few more times. The song I felt pretty confident with; we were to sing the first 30 something bars of the 1st number, 9 to 5. The musical version of the song is a BIT different but not significantly.
When I was called, it was up to sit "on deck" in a chair next to another girl while we waited for the guy ahead of us to finish his vocal part. Unless I was mistaken, he sang it 3 times. Then the girl ahead of me went in. She had a nice voice. Then I heard her do the acting part. Oh - did I mention the acting part? Basically they took a few verses from a song in the show and had is read that. Fortunately, I didn't know the song so it wasn't hard to just read it. They also put some notes about what feeling they were looking for. Afraid but hopeful...I could do that! (especially the fearful part! lol)
Then it was my turn. I sang but OMG...between the cold and waiting so long, my voice sounded weak at first. By the time I got to the chorus I felt and sounded alot better I thought. Then I did my reading...I was shaking! I don't know how HOPEFUL I sounded, but i definitely had the afraid part covered. Hahahahaha! Then it was back down to the sweat-pit to wait for everyone else to finish and then we'd be called in groups of 6 to do the choreography.
My group went up either 2nd or 3rd. We did it once with who I think was the assistant choreographer once, then we were to do it alone. So when we ran through it the first time, she messed up. Fortunately, I didn't follow her but they had us do it again with her out front. Then we did it alone. Other than one arm movement I didn't do, I felt like I nailed it. Who knew?! The part of the audition I thought I'd do the worst, I think it was my strong suit. And that was it. Call backs would be two nights after, if we were called.
I had auditioned for basically 3 parts, the ensemble and the pit chorus. The parts I had listed were Roz, Margaret (the office drunk) and Kathy (the office gossip). Roz has a great part and an awesomely hilarious song called Heart to Hart where she admits to the audience her love for the jerk.
So once again, call back night came and went without a call to me. I also texted a buddy of mine who had auditioned the night before I had. She was in The Sound of Music with me and I encouraged her to audition. She's a little cutie with a really lovely voice but auditions really intimidate her. Especially what she calls "theatre people". Theatre people, I think she means they are people who seem to know everyone important and experienced around them. They also have tons of experience in local and national theatre groups and aren't afraid to tell you about it. There were a few of those the night I went but they didn't intimidate me. I just try and make friends. Or at least be social. They are the competition after all.
Then Friday came; they didn't really say what time they'd be doing casting calls so needless to say my cell phone never left my sight. The whole work day passed without a call. Then I had some errands to run afterwards; nothing. I was walking into the salon I go to and suddenly...my phone rang. And it was an unknown number ring. Like last September, I knew it was them. I was right!
I was cast. And the best part? Not only was I part of the ensemble, but I had a PART! My part had a NAME! I was cast as Margaret; the office Lush! Hahahahaha!
A Nun one production, now a lush. At least I'm not being type-casted!
PS - my buddy was cast too!!!

Yo soy Americano....

Last night we had our 2nd rehearsal. After having my voice lesson the night before I was a bit more confident, even though I knew the old-school-church-latin would still be my nemesis.
I was early, as always, so when I walked in "Maria" and the "Von Trapp children" were practicing the song Do-Re-Mi. They knew the song, who doesn't, so they were practicing their choreography. Do you know how precious it is to see 14 kids running around trying to remember their steps while singing and trying not to bang into each other? It was adorable, somewhat controlled chaos and full of giggles! Why 14? They double-casted the kids roles so each kid will have 3 performances. Really smart move.
At one point she told them all to take a 5 minute water/bathroom break. So of course all the girls went running for the ladies room. One by one they all come out...except two. And rehearsal is starting again. Me, being the little kid wrangler I can be, went into the ladies room to make sure no one fell in. lol (not really - but just wanted to make sure none of them had an issue) Turns out, one of the littler girls decided to wash up to her elbows for some reason and couldn't get all the soap off. So I helped her with a few paper towels and off she went into the practice room.
After listening to them practice the Goat Herder song, it was time for us nuns to start. My voice teacher was there and this British woman who had been a bit too liberal with the atomizer. I smelled her the minute she walked in. And right on point, before we started singing, the stage director reminded us that people including herself have allergies so please don't power on the perfume before practice.
Then we went into the latin-nightmare songs we had "learned" last week. I use the word learned lightly. More like ran through like a prisoner with his ass on fire! I remembered some of it, but still the pronunciations aren't engrained in my head as of yet. We learned two more songs as well...this time he even asked my voice teacher to go over the correct wording and had us sing the melody in "do-do-do" until we had it down.
During the whole ordeal I made friends with the fellow Alto sitting next to me. (I decided against sitting in the front row or next to my teacher this week) At one point while the director was going through a few lines with the Soprano 1's (who sing the highest parts), the girl next to me made a face that I believe my ears would've made if they HAD a face. There were a couple Sop's singing inCREDIBLY tight, shrill and trilly. It actually hurt to listen to them. One of them the director recognized right away, hard not to since she was sitting practically right infront of him. He had her drop down to the Soprano 2 part,...and it wasn't the first time he had asked her to do that. She is definitely the queen of trilly. The other woman stayed well hidden, but eventually we found her out. Once all 4 parts were singing, it didn't sound AS bad.
Our last hour we were lined up to have our opening songs blocked. There was my voice teacher; front and center. Then as my line walked to the center of the back of the stage, me behind my trusty Alto buddy, I realized "hey, maybe my friends WILL be able to see me." The way they were talking at one part, it seemed as if we would be singing behind a scene drop the whole time. The best part was the 3 girls infront of me have to kneel during one part and my voice teacher comes back to us and turns to sing just to my right. Great - I've got a "that'll be me - right there!" moment to tell my friends about! lol
Now if we could only sing a song in ENGLISH!

Doh-nec Poh-num In-EE-me-cos-tu-ohs

Tonight I had my first voice lesson in...about 28 years. I'm not so confident about my singing that I don't think there's any room for improvement. I know there's better ways to warm up, breath and other techniques. To say I learned a few things just in one class is an understatement.
I'll start by saying my voice teacher (we'll just call her VT) has a GORGEOUS house. She doesn't live very far from me and I knew the street was pretty...it gives the house I live in a run at the ridiculously gorgeous title. I was seriously expecting to see a grand piano in the living room; it wouldn't have looked out of place.
We talked about how I started singing, what made me decide to audition and she told me her background as well.
Then she had me sing some scales. From that she broke down some ways to make my tone better. I have never had my posture corrected. Other than the usual stand up tall, chest out and don't stick out your chin. Leaning to one side, which I was going upstructs your breathing, just changing that made a difference. So we worked on breathing, and releasing breath and how to use that natural breathing instead of pushing it. Just those few tweeks made a difference. Not only how I my voice sounded but how it felt.
After a while we went over just a couple lines of one of the song we have to sing in the musical. Not just about breathing and speaking through it but using different voices to change the tone. One was talking a bit like Mickey Mouse or anunciating like you're from Canada. But big ROUND tones. She explained it as "speaking with an imaginary golf ball in your mouth." It feels REALLY strange, but it made sense with what she was going for.
I think I'll drive my co-workers crazy with that for the next week! At least I'll have an excuse as to why for a change!

A dream that will need, all the love you can give...

So tonight was the first REAL rehearsal. All Nuns (ensemble and leads) were to report to the center at 8pm. As always, I arrived early.
Maria and the Von Trapp kids were rehearsing when I walked in. I could hear Maria, that was about it. The musical director was teaching the kids their parts for the Goat Herder song. Then I noticed the girl who was casted as Liesl. Wow - what a voice she has! Definitely experienced and a bit opera-like but not in a trilly, watch-your-vibrato way. She's gunna give Maria a run for her money vocally.
I have to mention this; can I tell you how annoyed I was at adults being rude asses; chit-chatting loudly while the kids were rehearsing? It's not like there was a door between the people waiting and the rehearsal room. I seriously wanted to play librarian and "shhhhhhhh" their ignorant arses!
As soon as the kids and Maria were done, all us nuns sat in three rows of chairs with the Musical Director and piano in front of us. A couple people were missing during role call and from what I heard, they hadn't gotten in touch with one person who was casted. I say, cut her ass! LOL
Next the MD (musical director) asked who wanted to sing what part because the songs were mostly 3-4 part harmony. I chose either mezzo soprano/alto 1 or alto 2, depending on where he needed me. I ended up Alto 2.
Before I go on to complain about singing in Latin, I have to mention voice lessons before I forget! I decided that if I was going to do this part right and impress my cast mates and the directors, I'd take voice lessons. I haven't had any in years, not since college so I can't recall a lot of things like breathing techniques, warm up techniques, things like that. I emailed my first voice teacher; knowing she'd be busy with all the choirs and classes at the high school, I asked her if she could recommend anyone. I emailed the woman she mentioned, but that woman emailed me back saying her studio was booked solid. So I emailed my poor teacher again and looked around online. I found this one website with the instructor my ex-teacher mentioned and another woman was pictured next to her. I recognized her as a woman who was casted in the same musical. If it wasn't her, it was definitely her younger sister.
So when we went to sit down for rehearsal, I made a point to sit next to her so I could ask her. Turns out, it was her. (she really needs to update her picture, it was taken what appears to be about 10-15 years ago) I felt a little embarrassed asking a cast mate for lessons but let me tell ya what, the woman can sing! Her solo parts in the middle of the parts we were all learning were amazing. I can understand why she was casted as Mother Abbess.
Getting back to rehearsal; they had us move so the singing parts were sitting together and then we attempted to learn old-style latin. I STILL don't have it right. That's another thing this woman is going to have to teach me is how to pronounce these lyrics correctly. I found myself skating a bit vocally but I suffered through it happily. Especially when I was making jokes and getting to that place where the 4-part harmony hit JUST right. It was pretty impressive for a first rehearsal.
I had to laugh at one part, the MD reminded me of my high school physics teacher. (who flunked me by the way) Not because of his personality, but because of how he said the word measure. It's more like "MAYHshur". It cracked me up every time. We used to mock that teacher mercilessly but this guy wasn't so out of touch with his students. Especially when he told us 3 ways to keep from singing flat when you're singing accapella:  Raise your eyebrows, wiggle your toes or clench your butt cheeks. My response "All at the same time while staying in harmony AND singing latin?!" Ahhh...the lovely sound of people laughing at my jokes! Music to my ears!!

These are a few of my favorite things...

Tonight was our first "rehearsal". Since I didn't know where the Senior Center was I grabbed my GPS and left a bit early. Not surprisingly, I was the first one there. While I was walking in, one of the companies board members said hello and introduced herself to me in the parking lot. I remembered her right away. After I had auditioned for Miss Hannigan in Annie a couple years ago (and didn't get the role), I emailed her because she had introduced herself at the audition and was a member of the board. I asked her if she could give me advice as to how I could improve for my next audition. She replied that she was busy at the time but she would get back to me. You guessed it....that never happened. I was nice to her though. Especially since she did audition for the show and wasn't casted. Yes, board members can audition.
I was given a folder with some music and a few welcome pages and instructed to go into a room and have a seat. The chairs were together in a huge circle. The next person to come in was the girl my friend didn't like who she nicknamed "Purple". I will admit, the girl is a bit...over the top. VERY perky and bubbly and talk, talk, talk. Turns out, she was the one who called me to tell me I was casted. (Of course I had to text my friend to let her know) Soon the room had filled up. I didn't see "Mindy" or "Knees" but I saw the guy who myself and my friend named "the other James (because he resembled her husband) or James2. All I could do the whole time was look around and think "Who are they casted as? Who's Maria? Who's the captain?" I ended up moving down to sit a few seats down from Purple and, as it turns out, the woman sitting next to me was Purples Mom. After introducing herself and asking a few questions of me, she pointed out who was Maria. WOAH! Wait a minute! Mario is a 30+ year old woman?! That was surprising! But the big shock was when she pointed out who was to play the Captain. Wow. This guy is NO Christopher Plummer! I'd say he's in his 50's. And no, not handsome but you could definitely tell he was an experienced musical person. The woman told me that he played Daddy Warbucks in Annie. He even shaved his head for the role; now THAT'S dedication!
The president of the company stepped into the middle of the circle to start the night. He reminded me alot of Cameron Macintosh who's the producer of all the big shows like Le Miz and Phantom. Then another man took over and gave some more info, introduced the board members, blah, blah, blah. Then he had us go around the room, say our names and our roles. During the whole ordeal, we had to go into another room to be measured for our costumes. Thanks SO much to the lady measuring me who said I had a big head. LOL
I got back in the room just as I heard the one board member tell people to get up and go sit with someone else you don't know. I didn't move but some guy came and sat next to me. Whatever.
Then we were instructed to talk to the other person and find out their favorite things. Fine. His name is Tom, he went on for a bit about how he tries to be in productions with his kids (his daughter was in the show too), what sport he liked to play, what tv show and food and band...blah, blah, blah. Then people volunteered when they were ready to talk. It was a long ordeal but basically painless.
Afterwards the head-guy told us the reason he had us do this is because we're not going to see each other for a LONG time. That each group would be working seperately of each other. But this was a good way to make friends until that time. Then he said that we were done for the night and just then the guy next to me....farted...

Climb Every Mountain....

30 years ago I had a lead role in a musical. I played Josie Cohan in George M! I didn't know who Josie was, all I knew was I wanted to sing. THAT is one thing that's never changed. Even though I never really pursued it, I always wanted to sing. I can't drive my car without doing it, or listen to songs on my TV without joining in. It's a gift I was given and even though I have never done anything substantial with it, I still use it.
Now 30 years after being on the stage of the High School auditorium, I'm finally going to take the stage again. Better late than never...
About a month ago I received an email that a local Musical production company was going to be putting on a production of The Sound of Music. I had to audition for it. I knew I was too old for Maria and not operatic enough for Mother Whats-her-name, but I could do SOMEthing in it. So I decided it would be either a Nun or the Baroness. (although I've never felt girly enough to play the Baroness either) As the audition date got closer and after listening to the song the Baroness sings with Max, I decided that it was just going to be a Nuns role for me.
I had auditioned before for this company when they doing Annie. I wanted to be Miss Hannigan in the WORST way. I tried out, I didn't get it. You know that I still can't watch that movie since?
Back to this audition, I wanted to do it right this time. I bought a pair of dance shoes, bought a book about auditioning for musical theater and even changed my choice of audition clothes because of what I read in that book. I made a hair appointment for that night and even had a makeup artist "paint my face". Would the $135+ be a complete waste?
AUDITION NIGHT:
My hair was pretty, my makeup was subtle but perfect and my clothes were bright and comfortable. A friend of mine wanted to go with me to see what auditions were all about and provide some moral support. All her questions about how auditions worked were a great distraction during the drive there.
Once in the door with my new dance shoes fastened tightly, I signed in, got my number (217), got a head shot taken and picked up a choreography card. While filling it out I noticed a young girl sitting at the table across from me. This girl was a pro I thought, she even had a head shot! She introduced herself, I can't remember her name to save my life, and said how she was from Long Island and living in town for college. The Choreography card asked how many years of dance training I had. Did the years night-clubbing count? How about all those country lines dances I learned? hahahaha - probably not. I witteled it down to two and a half; the two years of dance classes I took in college and the months I learned how to tap for George M! Then I went to the table to drop that and my application off. Yes, they have you fill out an application. The most hilarious part for me was the musical theatre experience portion. Production: George M! - Role: Josie Cohan - Year: 1982.That was it. Ouch!
They corralled us all into the theater. My friend was impressed "Wow! You're going to audition right on stage?" "Yup!" I replied. The president of the company introduced himself and the other people in charge of the production. I recognized the musical director, the choreographer and the piano accompanist. That was it. Then they called us all up on stage to learn a short routine. Step up right-ball change-step back-ball change. Scuff right, and in. Grapevine to the right, left behind-right over-scuff right(which I screwed up the timing on every time)-scuff left and in. And then dance slowly in a circle-Done. Sounds easy enough, right? And seemed easier than the one we learned for Annie. They called us up in groups, I was in the 2nd group and they made us run it twice. I felt SEMI confident but definitely messed up the double-scuffs both times. Oh well.
Then they called up the women who wanted to audition for nuns or nun ensemble to the stage to sing. Myself and maybe 5 other women went up. We had to sing 4 lines of The Sound of Music. Then I was called first to solo. Wait; when I auditioned for Annie we all stepped back and then stepped up when we were ready to go. Not this time. I was up, there was no turning back now. So I sang - tried to hold the end notes long. Tried to remember to make eye contact with the judges. I remember doing that. I tried not to look at my friend, afraid that she'd make me giggle. Then it was over. I stepped off. No one in the audience looked at me, or clapped or smiled or anything. Then next woman was already singing...crackly and off-key. I guess I was a hard act to follow!
We sat there for another half hour or so watching people go up to sing for other roles. When they called up ladies for the Baroness, I regretted not going up. The song was pretty easy and not too high. The women were all older than me and more dressed up than I was. Then we watched the "Marias" and the "Liesl's", who were basically the same girls. A couple of older women went up for Maria. Definitely too old for that role but maybe they mistakenly thought it was for Maria's Mom? We made comments between songs; made up nicknames for some, being judges for most. I remember the names Knees, Purple Girl (who my friend did NOT like), the other James and Maria's Mom. LOL - it made the whole process much more fun. After a while we left, walking out at the same time as one of the Maria Moms.
Call backs were slated for Friday. If we were called we would have to go back and either sing, dance or act. Friday came and went with no word. I wasn't happy. They didn't know me well, how could they already decide my fate? I figured it was not a good sign.
Casting calls were set for around 10am Saturday morning. I took a pill to help me sleep Friday night and hopefully sleep in a bit the next morning. I did sleep well that night but was awake at 7am as usual the next day. So I paced, i cleaned, I changed my bed sheets, I did dishes, I watched SportsCenter and waited for my phone to ring. I turned the movie The Devil's Advocate on. Yes! Pacino will keep me occupied. The time was ticking away but my phone was not ringing. 10 o'clock, 10:15, 10:30, 10:35...Nothing. I gave in. I wasn't casted. So I enjoyed Pacino's speech about how it was the devil's time. The awesome evilness was just what I needed. Keanu's character shot himself in the head, Pacino screamed and burned, the sinners in the wall hanging screamed, and then...my phone rang! It wasn't a recognizeable number but it was local. I knew it, it was them! And it was; I was casted! The girl on the end of the line, whose name I can't remember, congratulated me and told me I was going to be part of the nun ensemble. Did I accept the role? YES!! There will be no dancing, which I thought was a funny thing for her to mention. I didn't care! I'm getting to sing again; on a stage, in front of people! First rehearsal is tomorrow. I called my friend who went w/me to the audition, I called my actor friend who gave me some encouraging words earlier, I called my best friend from high school, I called a couple other local friends, I texted my best friend in Chattanooga and I called my sister who put me on speaker phone. Her, my Mom, my Aunt and my cousin were at the reception after the memorial service for a family member who had passed away recently. So I got to tell them all at once, which felt SO good. They're excited, I'M excited; I get to sing!!!

Comfort that isn't food

During this wonderful time of unemployment, I've found that the one thing I have really focused on is comfort. I've always been about comfortable jeans instead of what's in style, I love comfortable clothes like sweats and t-shirts and dare I even say comfort food? Too much of it actually! I'm a boredom eater and since I've obviously been bored, I think my grocery bill has doubled! Fortunately, my waist hasn't.
But getting past that, there are others thing I've found extremely comforting. The most significant is movies. Yeah, movies! Ever since the employment bombshell was dropped back in October I've found that the best way to relax my mind and body so I can get to sleep is by popping an old movie into the DVD or even my VHS player. My favorites are Cyrano de Bergerac (the Jose Ferrar version, which I think I can recite by heart by now), Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Valley Girl, Mary Poppins and The Muppet Movie (although for some reason the song Rainbow Connection tends to make me cry lately so I try to stay away from that one if I'm feeling lower than usual). Last night I fell asleep to Willy Wonka, the original. I never made it to inside the chocolate factory. passed out, sawing wood...zzzzzzzzzzzz.
And then there's old TV shows. I don't know how many times I've watched Happy Days episodes on YouTube the last couple months. Especially stuff from seasons 3-5, there's some really great ones. Like when the guys went to Lake Whitefish for Easter break and rented the front of a house. They told those older women who were renting the house itself that they were Tunisian Camel jockeys. OMG...hahahaha! They just don't make shows like that anymore!
And the last comforting thing; smells. Specifically, my favorite Italian deli and Play Doh. Home and childhood. They say smells are the strongest memory trigger. Makes me hungry and nostalgic all at the same time!
I think I'll go eat something until the show Too Cute comes on Animal Planet. Bring on the kittens! I also find comfort in cuteness!

3rd time - waiting for the charm

So like many American's, I am currently on the job market. Although I do have a job. At least until the end of January.
Our company was sold to our #1 competitor back in mid-October. Nice huh? It was a shock to everyone. It wasn't like we were struggling; if anything, things were turning around. Granted, cash was tight. So they sold us for 3 times what they paid but about half of what we were really worth.
I remember the day well. Actually, I woke up around 3am that morning just freaked out about something. I had no idea what but it took me a while to calm down. Then I got to work and the company attorney, the CFO, the Controller and an HR manager were already there. They NEVER beat me in. I knew something was wrong...I figured layoffs were coming. I was almost right.
One bad thing about it was I was in the process of buying a new car. I had to call the dealership and break the bad news. (Did I mention the whole sale process felt dream-like and unreal?)
For now I have to report to work until mid-month, then I get paid through the end of January. After that, my unused vacation pay and my 4-week severance....I'll be officially unemployed. Crazy.
I've been through this before, sort of. The first time I got laid off. No notice at all. I think I received about 3 or 4 weeks pay then. I found a job within 2. The second time I was working as a contractor and after a big contract was put on hold, my position was ended. I found a job then as well. Question is, will I be as lucky this time?
I have done some job browsing and I have applied to a few places but I haven't really "pounded the pavement" as of yet. It's a few weeks before Christmas and I figure, why not relax over the holidays and then go after it after the new year.
The real question is; will this be a transitional job...or a career?
Stay tuned....

If there's one thing I can do, it's bitch!

So I started a new part-time job at a local restaurant that JUST opened. I'm not going to say the name. But there's no REAL use in being secretive either.
Training for this job was....LONG. 8+ days of menu training, right-attitude adjustment and dance training. Yes, dance. The reason I LOVE this job is the dancing. First time I've had a job where I've actually been encouraged to be my crazy, dancing, singing self.
Along the way I nightly broke a sweat, failed a few menu tests (not sure of the outcome of that), voiced my concern about the late hours (they serve until 1am on weeknights?) and developed a COLASSAL crush on one of the trainers. (which I still can't shake) To the point where I'm not sure I'm gunna even enjoy this job after he leaves. I feel like I've fallen into a time machine and woken up in my 20s. Yeah - that kind of crush. I wish I was in my 20s. Back when I was skinny, not a double-digit jean size! Speaking of jeans, that's what the uniform is; the t-shirt they supply us and jeans. Another reason why I wanted to work there.
I'm sure along the way I will use this blog as a means to get out my gripes in regards to this gig. That's a given. We'll see how the customer-stupidity stacks up! My complaints about it so far: the post-shift cleaning, the un-friendly trainers and the co-workers who have gone through the same training as me but feel somewhat better at their jobs so they must tell me how to do mine. Ummm...I don't think so Junior! lol. Oh, and did I mention that employees can't sit at the bar? Ever?! even when we come in for dinner? Seriously. I found this out last night when me and my friend Julie went. I had no idea. I don't remember being told that but, whatever. I can understand before or after a shift but if I come in for dinner to spend MY money....I should be treated the same as ANY customer...or better!
So there you go. Those are my beefs.
More to come!

No - I'm not the crazy bird lady!

Ever since I can remember, I've liked birds. Well, I always liked animals but I've almost always had a bird. We had an Chinese Nightengale named Admiral when I was a kid. Couldn't tell you what he even looked like but I remember his cage and that we fed him crushed dog food and meal worms. I've also had canaries; many canaries. Presently I have one canary who I bought for my cousin; who lost interest in it and gave it to her mother who traded it with me for my obnoxious, biting yet charming parakeet named Louise, who I adopted from my friends Jimmy and Elaine. I also have a pair of parakeet brothers now who I've named Jimmy and Stewart. (pictured) They reek havoc on my ears some times but are also adorable and entertaining.
One thing I can't quite remember is how or where my fascination with wild birds began. I know alot of the breeds and I can sit and watch them feed for hours without getting bored; unless it's a flock of sparrows. Where did this come from?
My sister is into it; so is my Mother and my Aunt. My sister actually has a set-up from the store Wild Bird's Unlimited which I call the bird feeder Taj Mahal. Last year I even hung feeders in a tree outside a window at work until the bitches I work with complained so I had to either move them to a tree I wouldn't be able to see from a window, or take them down. I chose the later. (however I did recently hang a hummingbird feeder; who could complain about that?)
Now I'm a little pre-occupied with hanging feeders outside my apartment. The problem is, I'm on the 2nd floor of a house. Solution? Hang them from whatever hardware I can find on my sun porch. I now have a Squirrel Buster Min, which the squirrels have gotten so aggravated with they did something to it which made it pop off the hardware and plummet down from the 2nd level into the front yard. The bastards! I rescued all but one important piece which is probably caught up in the multi-layer roof or a gutter somewhere.
Then yesterday I purchased a really nice window feeder and, sure enough, this morning a chickadee and a couple house finches found it. (see picture of the chickadee visiting)
Future plans; get out the power drill and attach some more hardware so I can hang another Squirrel Buster Mini, get a window hook to hang a hummingbird feeder and some more hardware to hang an Oriole Feeder. I did spot an Oriole outside my house in a bush last year. Who knew; Orioles in the hood?

Grammy's and complaints

Wow, can't believe it's been almost a year since I blogged. What have I been doing? Tweeting too much; facebook'ing like a crack addict.
I haven't moved yet because...well, I don't know. I'm lazy. That's a fact. I get home from work and I don't want to do shit. I could've had my apartment packed up months ago. More about that later...
So tonight is Sunday and the Grammy's are on. So many artists that I'm like "Who is that" and "Why is that crap nominated?" I must be old.
Oh great, Jamie Foxx is introducing someone. Is he gunna plug his new movie? A new CD? The only reason I can tolerate him is because I know my boy Robert Downey Jr is a friend of his.
Cee-Lo is on now doing "Forget you" instead of the "Fuck you" we all wanted to hear. And he looks like a cross between George Clinton, Elton John and NBC Peacock. With Muppet back-up
singers.
Okay, back to my life. Can I just say it, 2011 has sucked with a capital UCKED! Bad stuff went down at the house, then my car starting acting up, then my canary died and then the ONE thing I took joy in at work, some bird feeders I had hanging up outside the office window, they made me either move or take down. The back-stabbing, two-faced bitches I work with. I know who complained. So now not only do I want to move, but I want a new job too. I'm SICK of busting my ass at that place while others do nothing and just freaking coast. And get paid more than I do FOR their coasting. I'm surrounded by fucking slackers. And the managers don't do anything about it because they don't care. They're bringing home their money. It's beyond frustrating. What I really want to do...is move back home. I want to be with my family. There's nothing for me in Rochester. My phone doesn't ring with people asking me to do stuff. My friends have their own lives now. There's nothing here for me. If my Mom lived alone right now, I'd be gone. I'd pack up my shit and just go. Put it into storage and just hang out with my Mom.
Okay, Katy Perry is on. I know who she is. lol. Is she gunna do that fireworks-out-her-ass routine again? I like Glee's version of Teenage Dreams better than hers, sorry! Darren Criss killed that shit.
What's up with John Mayer trying to look like Johnny Depp?
Nice, Lady Antebellum won Song of the Year. Nice. Great song. And it's cute that they're choked up about it.
You're probably wondering why I posted the pic of Michael Waltrip on this post. The stink face was appropriate. It's how I've felt so far about this year. Two months in and it's basically been....a big turd.

The Great Apartment Hunt begins

For 10 years I have lived in a peaceful apartment on the 2nd floor of a beautiful home in Rochester, NY. (and no, that is not a picture of the house) There were/are occasional inconveniences like the guy who lived down the hall whose girlfriend screamed during sex, (although that was more amusing than inconvenient) the ceiling fan downstairs that makes obnoxious noises in my bedroom, the girl who lived down the hall at one point whose boyfriend was verbally abusive to her and even the police came looking for him once. But even those issues didn't make me REALLY want to move out.
All that changed in October 2009.
My landlord decided that the best person to offer a studio apartment right next to a 45 year old, two job working woman is a 19 year street kid who has NEVER lived on his own and whose mother lives only a block away. Hmmm...doesn't it make you wonder WHY she would be kicking him out basically? Not my landlord. He never even did a background check or considered the outcome of this, he let the kid move in 1 day later.
Ever since, the 2nd of floor of this beautiful home has turned into the party, pot-smoking spot for bunches of local city idiots who drop f-bombs at least 5 times in one sentence. Nice, right?
So every night, I smell pot. Every weekend, I hear loud "music" (if you can call it that) until all hours in the morning. I hear people basically YELLING (talking?) to each other across an apartment that can't be more than 9 feet wide.
This is my life now.
Yes, I've complained. MANY times. From Day 1 because the partying began on Day 1. Allegedly, my landlord had a talk with him but nothing changed. I complained again. Nothing changed. And again, AND again, AND again. Until I got sick of complaining.
Why haven't I called the police? Well, being a single woman living on my own who has to walk by the party apartment every morning and every night....there's a little bit of a security issue there. I don't know these people, I don't know what they'd do if I did something. And I don't want to know. And the thing is, i shouldn't have to. My dumb-ass landlord should've known better and should've taken care of it 7 fucking months ago. (there's my one F-bomb)
Recently I had hoped there was a solution on the horizon. A "friend" of mines boyfriend owns a house who a friend and bandmate of his was living in by himself. They offered to let me move in there as a temporary or permanent solution. So not only would I be out of the current place but I'd have a WHOLE HOUSE to live in. Suddenly that option was taken from me. The rug pulled out from under me. I can no longer sit in my apartment, hear the shit going on the other side of the wall and think "It's only temporary, it's only temporary". I'm stuck again.
So now "The Great Apartment Hunt" begins. It started yesterday when I had appointments to see two places; both in really nice villages, in the center of said villages to be exact.
The first was on a 2nd floor above some businesses in the village of Webster. Looked nice on craigslist. I arrived before the agent did to find the landlord arguing with someone. And I heard what sounded like a VERY protective dog. The stairway up to the 2nd floor looked pretty old and somewhat neglected. The railing at the top even had nails coming out of it and moved if you leaned on it.
The hallway was painted green and everything, let's face it, looked cheap. The dog continued to bark and growl the whole time. Two other dudes, who I found out were from Ontario, showed up. (Ontario is basically the red-neck neighbor of the Rochester area) This place seemed more their style. The tenant was out and his brother, who lived down the hall, was the one the landlord was talking to. I guess he wanted him to hold the dog so he could show the place and the guy didn't want to be bothered. After trying numerous keys the landlord discovered that the tenant had changed the deadbolt. (which I THINK is illegal when you're renting). The funniest part was when they tried and describe the place. I also realized, it had no bath tub. BZZZZT! Thanks for playing. So I finally left.
The 2nd apartment was in the middle of the village of Penfield in an old mansion (pictured above) that I passed about a million times when I lived in Penfield with my Mom. I was very excited to see the place. The owner was waiting for me, leaning on his black Escalade. He started telling me about the property and this little house next to it, some guy who's going to cell ice cream on the corner all summer and then we finally went inside. I bet the entrance was nice back in the day. First he knocked on the wrong door and a college-age girl answered, as we tried to keep from stepping on the 20 pairs of shoes laying all over the landing. (red flag) He opened the other apartment and I couldn't believe what I saw. The living room was about as big as my kitchen, the bedroom was about the same (and didn't even have a closet) and the kitchen...was about the size of my pantry. As was the bathroom. I told him right away that I loved the house and the area but I have too much stuff for such a cracker jack box. Not to mention $680+gas and electric? for THAT?!?! Freakin crazy.
Needless to say, Day 1 of TGAH was a bust.

Is it July yet??

If the cold weather, the piles of snow and the crappy drivers aren't enough to make me want summer to be here quicker, this doesn't help either:

Another reality TV couple bites the dust..

I've gotta admit, I didn't see THIS one coming.
That bitch Deanna dumped my favorite dude from her Bachelorette show; Jessie.
Granted, this show has had one or maybe two successes from all the seasons they've had.
I said once that if the dates were more reality-based, maybe they'd have a shot but when
one minute you're strutting the beaches of a tropical Island and the next you're ordering from
the window at the local Dairy Queen....that can be difficult to handle.
I feel for Jessie though; I've heard that line before myself.


Chin up sweetheart, some snow bunny will be MORE than happy to take her place!

"Lollipops, Ice cream...and all free today"

One of my all-time favorite villians!