Where to begin....

Gotta love the t-shirt, huh? Thank you Christine, I got a great laugh over it. Which I needed. I consider myself a pretty low-key, low drama person but sometimes reality just comes crashing in and on those moments i have to vent. So here's my latest stress.....maybe writing about it will make me feel better. Couldn't hurt.
I am job paranoid; I'm completely insecure at work and it sucks. I started in purchasing about 8 years ago and figured I'd finally found a job I was good at. It's kind of the opposite of sales; you still have the daily people contact without having to do all the customer ass kissing. I've never been one who was good a BS'ing so I don't think I could be a good enough personal sales pitch. So 3 jobs ago I had this pretty decent gig at this company and somehow I always found a way to screw it up. I just killed it with procrastination. If something turned out to be too difficult, I just put it aside until it became a MAJOR issue. It was weird, I almost felt like I was planning my demise because it ALWAYS caught up with me. My boss was so hands on,....to the point where he'd run duplicate reports and check our work so it wasn't something I could hide. He put up with; I got screamed at once but other than that it was a relatively painless job. Wait, no it wasn't. It sucked. I hated it. I couldn't get over the hump, it was STRANGE. I looked for other jobs but didn't find much. Then one day I finally got my reprieve. I was laid off.
So on I went to another gig that I found two weeks later. Or should I say, it found me. Now this job, I liked. I liked the people, I loved my boss and the job was pretty easy and the pay was great. The only issue....I was a contractor with no real chance at getting hired on. After about a year and a half, I started getting antsy for things like decent health coverage that didn't cost me half my paycheck and PAID VACATION. So I found another job. Things were headed in the right direction. WRONG.
This job was a nightmare. It was in purchasing but I had NO experience in the area of their business. None. Zero. Zilch. I got by for about 3 months and then it went to to hell. The owner hated me, my supervisor compiled lists of the "issues" she had to resolve with me, everyone in the office other than two people were two-faced back-stabbers. At least the owner was pretty clear about how he felt about me. Fortunately, I left my contractor gig in such good standing, they even told me at my going away bar bash that if this gig didn't work out to call them and they'd do whatever they could to get me back. So one day while I was scanning the online job ads, I saw my present position listed on Careerbuilder.com. That was it. I went right in to the HR bitches office and confronted her on it. She denied it of course but went running into my supervisors office the minute my back was turned. On the way to a doctors appointment that same day I called my ex-boss and asked him if I could come back. Let me tell you, putting in my 6 day notice (fuck em, they didn't earn 2 weeks worth of respect from me!) was the greatest day I had in MONTHS.
Back to contractor gig I went and it was even better the 2nd time than the first. (the job...get your mind out of the gutter!) My attitude was completely different, my job was a little different and actually better than what I had left and I was making more money. Unfortunately, business was down and suddenly my job was in jeopardy of going away. Right around the holidays no less. My boss felt bad and I understood that. I really wanted to find something before I got let go....which I did.
So day 2 of the year 2006 I started my new job. It's temp-to-perm and basically I feel like I have 13 weeks to prove myself worthy. (4 down, 9 to go) So here I am, paranoid. I'm afraid to make a mistake. I wake up and worry and I come home running the whole day through my head making sure I did everything right. Isn't that crazy? Who can live like this?! I don't want to be the procrastinator anymore...which I feel I've definitely conquered but at the same time I still have nightmares from the last job-from-hell. I couldn't trust a person in the place so anytime someone at my new office has a closed door meeting, I think they're talking about me. I think my supervisor is interviewing my replacement behind my back and I'm scared to make a wrong move. It's just insane.
I took alot of psychology classes in college and what it comes down to is I have to forgive myself for my past screw ups, learn from them and not repeat them. The issue I can't seem to resolve is how to get over this whole "everyone's out to get me" feeling. Does anyone have Dr. Phil's phone number?

Watch sweaty, over-paid men or puppies?

Somewhere within this 7-month old blog there had to be a time when I wrote about my love of animals. I just love 'em, grew up with them and can't imagine a place being a home without them. The problem is, I'm allergic to them; at least the ones with fur anyway. So I live vicariously through my friend Christine and her doggie-daughter Dottie, my sister and her two furry family members Heidi and Puss-puss, my mother and my ex-cat Pepper and my aunt and her buddy Buddy and her cat Queen. I do have two birds but they can't exactly sit on your lap, lick your face or keep your feet warm.

I am also a serious watcher of the channel Animal Planet. Great Show that Animal Precinct, although alot of times it's really hard to watch. I can't fathom for the life of me why anyone would abuse or neglect an animal. To me it's like doing the same to a child. How could you take advantage of something so helpless? Bring back torture, that's what I think. An eye for an eye. Going to jail is too much of an easy way out. But that's a blog for another time.

Last year while watching Animal Planet they announced they were having a show on Super Bowl Sunday called The Puppy Bowl. I think they called it punts, passes and puddles. Something along those lines. I couldn't help but tune in,..puppies just melt my heart. So there it was, a small football field with the yard lines, the stands and even goal posts. There were some footballs on the field but most of the puppies couldn't be bothered with them. They either wrestled with each other, drank or splashed in the water bowls that were underneath the goal posts or tried to climb the walls and get out. There was a referee near by to clean up "fouls" and even replays to show the cutest or funniest moments. This went on for about 3 hours, then repeated. I was HOOKED. Screw the 10 hour Super Bowl pre-game, the pre-taped, lousy remdition of the anthem, the ridiculously over-produced half time show and the game which always seems to end up a blow-out. The commercials have been the best part for the last few years.

Fortunately again this year Animal Planet has announced that there will be a Puppy Bowl II. This year it will even include a half-time show with kittens. Can you STAND it?!?! I'm even considering having a Puppy Bowl party. (no fur allowed, sorry!)

To see some hilarious and adorable video clips you can go here:
http://animal.discovery.com/convergence/puppybowl/video_gallery/videogallery.html

You think Vegas will be taking odds next year for the PB MVP?

Move dat car sistah

After living in the heart of the city of Rochester for the last 6+ years I've learned that Drivers Ed, my drivers test and all those years behind the wheel didn't teach me a thing.
People who live and drive in the city have a completely different set of rules. I'm exposed to new ones every day.
So here is the short list of things I've learned:

You can stop at ANY time with no regard to the people behind you. Especially to talk to someone who's walking down the street. No need to pull over. And make sure you give the cars behind you a dirty look or better yet call them a bitch when they honk their horn and find some way to get around you.
Parking your car on the street is fine, feel free to leave lots of room between your car and the curb.
Stopping at red lights is optional.
To figure out the mph for each street, read the sign and mulitply the number by 3.
Left on Red
Be sure to leave that 2 inches of braking space between you and the car ahead of you.
To take a left onto a busy street, pull your car into the middle of the intersection. Once the oncoming cars have screeched to a halt, you're free to go. (shit, just go...don't wait for them to stop)
2 lanes merging into one isn't a problem, drive up until you can't go any further and be sure to cut someone off so you can get over.
Turn signals are for pussies

Glad I practiced those K-turns and parallel parking, they've come in SO handy!

Rochester Fast Ferry sinks

So the fast ferry made the headlines again tonight, but for all the wrong reasons. It's going bye-bye. New mayor Duffy decided not to make the city and the tax payers fund it anymore. Well, not completely anyway but he also said that we would need to put 9.5 million into it to pay off debts and sell it. And all they were asking for was another 1.5. Hmmm...that'll definitely be debated to death for the next week. Or month.
Personally, I never rode the ferry but I was all for it being here. There was something big-city and awesome about it that I couldn't explain to you. Seeing it I suppose is understanding.
The thing is, the boat seemed to be jinxed from the start. It hit a dock in New York City, barely squeezed through the Hudson River lockes, it broke down several times, fell off the lift while it was being repaired, it got so in debt that it got locked down for months, the city paid way over what it cost at an auction even though there weren't any other bidders and when it finally started they kept decreasing and decreasing the number of runs it was making. Next thing you know, they were asking the city tax payers to give up another 11 million.
I feel for all the people who put so much time and effort into it. I feel for the businesses who paid rent to be in the ferry terminal who somehow survived when it was in lock down although I think they got some business from people who were just coming around to look at it. What do they have now? Charlotte Beach is a ghost town when it's cold and we have that kind of weather 9 of the 12 months in a year.
So I'm a little sad about it. Not to mention that drive on the QEW is a nightmare most of the time!
Too bad our "friends" in Canada didn't help out paying for that tub. That could've made all the difference.
As the kids from South Park said "BLAME CANADA!"